Mutual Feelings
by ssllww
Summary: "how disrespectful would it be... for us to look for a future... together?" Tom and Mary fan fiction set after the final episode of season 5.


**This is set sometime after Roses' wedding. I think that Tom and Mary grow closer during that, and I think they would go quite well together. Hope you enjoy.**

"Tom , why don't you stay?" Mary asked, "All those memories, do they mean nothing to you?" he looked at her, she had tears in her eyes. He would have never imagined that when he drove her to her fittings, but now things were different, he saw her more the way that Carson saw her, someone to cherish. He sighed,

"Mary, those memories are the only things here for me now. And I can take them anywhere, somewhere I belong." She rolled her eyes,

"Tom, I didn't think you were someone to give up on things so easily. What about Sybbie, what about all of us." She turned away, she walked towards the door, " I'm sorry, it's just not fair that you can waltz away after all that's happened and expect everything to be fine."

She left the room, Tom closed his eyes, what if she was right. He shook his head, she can't be, but there was something that had changed between them since Matthew had died, and she had begun to live her life again. He stood in the library for a moment, then without thinking he left and headed to the door of the servants stairs. He hesitated, then opened the door. He could hear the noise of the kitchen, and Mrs Patmore shouting at a poor kitchen girl for not putting a teaspoon of something in when she should have. He smiled at the scenes he was accustomed to, but it didn't feel like home anymore the family had stopped trying to change him but it was continuing. He turned the corner at the bottom of the stairs and saw Carson.

"Mr Carson , might I have a word?" Carson tried to hide his surprise of Tom being downstairs,

"Of course, my office?" Tom nodded. They walked in silence until they entered the room. " what is it that you want Mr Branson?" Carson asked politely,

"it's about Lady Mary," Tom began, Carson sat down and gestured to Tom to do the same. "as you may have heard, I plan to go to America," Carson nodded, "but Lady Mary has expressed a particular opinion that she doesn't like it. Now that, and other things are beginning to make me hesitate."

"what other things, may I ask?" Carson said slowly,

"would it be disrespectful to the late Lady Sybil and Mr Matthew if, Lady Mary and I were not separate?" Mr Carson sat up,

"I don't quite know what you mean." He replied, "Is Lady Mary aware of this?"

"I don't know, I haven't asked. I thought that as you are fond of her and she likewise, that I would consult you." Carson let out a slight laugh,

"I suggest that you let her be the judge of where you stand. Is that all?" Tom nodded and left the room.

As he walked back into the hall, Mary was on the telephone, he waited, she caught his eye and ended the call,

"Tom?" she said walking over to him, he looked at her, " I've thought, if you feel that you must go, then I shall let you but I shall make you feel eternally guilty." He smiled,

" I would feel eternally guilty if I stayed or left." She looked at him,

"I don't understand."

" you've had suitors at your beck and call, do you ever get bored of it?" she sighed,

"since Matthew died, I have longed for a quieter life, one where I don't have to live up to expectations. To bring George up with someone who loves him like I do. That in truth is one of the reasons I want you to stay." He looked at her, "you love him like that, I don't expect that when I marry again my husband will, but I know you would." He smiled.

" there is a part of me that doesn't want to go," they were walking out of the front door now. "and that's now increasing. I don't know what to do." He looked down, " Mary, how disrespectful would it be," he paused, she looked at him,

"how disrespectful would what be?" she asked, though knowing the answer,

"for us to look for a future." He sighed, "together?" she exhaled, she didn't have to ask to whom it would be disrespectful,

"I believe they would want us to be happy." She smiled,

"would it make you happy?" he asked. She thought,

"It might."

They walked till they were near the lake, she wanted to know if it would. She put her hand on his arm to stop him, he turned to face her. She sighed and moved closer, he placed a hand around her waist. Her breathing increased, she smiled before pressing a kiss on his cheek. Then she traced his jaw line with her thumb, he held her closer, " kiss me." She breathed, he smiled and kissed her softly. He broke way, her eyes were still closed, he leaned in again, this time for longer. Her hand ran in slow circles on his back. He placed a hand on the back of her head. They stayed like that till they needed to breathe. She smiled and took his hand and lead him to a bench where they kissed again, gaining passion. His hand on her thigh, caressing it gently, she melted deeper into him. She moaned softly has he caught her tongue. She lay down, pulling him with her, still kissing. They knew no one would catch them, they never came out this far. She wrapped herself around him. For a moment they stopped kissing he smiled and pulled her up, so she was on his lap, and then he carried her to the edge of the lake, with her kissing his neck. She couldn't care less what happened next she was already 'damaged goods', Tom knew that, and he himself was too overcome by passion to think of the circumstances if they were caught. He gently put her feet down and she removed his jacket, she sat down and slid herself gently into the lake. It came to just below her shoulders, she shivered slightly although the water wasn't too cold. He joined her and they began their kissing again, more forcefully than before. He unbuttoned her skirt and top whilst she removed his trousers and shirt. They were in their underwear in the middle of the pond yet it felt the most natural thing to do. They removed the final items of their clothing and placed it on the bank. She wrapped her legs around him and felt him harden as their bare skin touched.

"are you sure?" he asked her quietly. She nodded. They kissed again as he pressed her gently onto the side of the bank. He held her hips as he gently entered, she moaned as he moved in her gently at first then she pulled him closer and he kissed her more as he pushed into her more. She wrapped her legs round his waist and lent on the side, he kissed her torso as he moved back and forth, she had to hold in a scream, when he thrusted into her with particular force. She moved her body closer to him, and he kissed her pale skin. "Mary," he moaned as she traced up and down his leg with her toes, she smiled. And pulled him closer again. He thrusted into her again and she struggled for breath. He pulled out and held her close. Their breathing heavy. They didn't move for a while. She began to shiver. "clothes." She nodded. They were sodden but dressed. They sighed,

"what are we going to do?" She asked,

"I'll go through the servants door, I can get to my room easily from the stairs."

"what if someone catches you?" Mary asked.

"then I'll say I slipped into the lake and didn't want to make the carpets all wet upstairs." She smiled and they turned to walk back.

**Thanks, I'm not sure if I'm going to leave it there or carry on, I will probably carry on for a couple more chapters. I know that I escalated quickly but Mary and Tom would probably move fast, if they had the chance. Please give me some feedback if you want anymore and also ideas of what could happen. Thanks :)**


End file.
